I'm really anxious about something but I don't know what....

Somehow, something isn't quite right...

Currently, in the mood swings right now...even though Christmas is this Sunday, I didn't even feel it coming...I just wish I could sleep and wake up in my own bed room...I just wished...

Girls are coming, 5 of them actually from one of the polys...it sucks to be here for the first few days but they will get along...Quarrelling with taxi-driver, bargain heatedly with auto-drivers, they will some how become normal to you...

I really wanna see their faces when they see man peeing in public...Literally, they think they are still 5 year old, invisible kid and totaly oblivious to a million or so passed by him...totally turn off for India's tourism...

I have been scrimping and saving every last bit of my money right now and I don't know how to enjoy without any money for this weekend trip to Mahabalipuram...I just don't want to touch my "reserved-till-21" money because of this expenditure, I must exhibit strict displine when comes to money.

I don't know why I can get quickly heated up over trivial things...sometimes, I just blow over for a little as 8 rupees. It is not I demand the 8 rupees ( SGD1 = Rs25 approx.) but the cashier demand it. It goes like this...

While, Aaron, Yh and I were about to leave the canteen after our coffee break, he called me to cough up Rs8. The fact was that, I have already paid to one of his fellow colleagues. So, honestly, I said I have already paid up. When he insisted that I didn't pay and indicating his "who-haven't-pay" book has no record, I started to flare up. By then, everyone stunned looking into the commotion.

I threw aside one of the chairs which is blocking my way to find that little boy who happens to wash used utensils. With rage and fire, I called out that boy who was stunned and speechless. I just point him to his "boss". I just remained silent and fuming at the same time.

My voice was over the din and a sea of people were wondering what the hell has happened to the once peaceful canteen. I could feel people eyed at me as I stormed out of the canteen and almost break the door down. The door opens with a loud bang and I just simply walk through it, fuming mad. If I didn't control down, it will damn chaotic.

Poor Aaron and Yh, who have to dodge glances from the petrified people who want to enjoy the last break before heading home. I also pitied the people there. It was just unacceptable when some unscruplous man, insisting that he was right. I know that I'm right and I proved it that way. If simple English didn't work, there is always a better way....I don't recommend my way of course, it was his damn attitude that cause a shocking effect for everybody....

I know I could peacefully go and look for the boy and asked him to explain the boss about the misunderstanding...I wasn't really intend to blow on that day... but his freaking attitude just washed away my patience.

For me, it is easy to forgive the people, but I'm not so that forgetful. Every move, is burned in my head forever. Once I condemn, it is for life.